blanket of snow

well more like layers of cake =]
the fresh white pure snow continues to lay itself
among the sidewalks, balconies, trees

the only thought crossing my mind is ...
how will i reach sauga tmr... ugh ...

=]

waiting...
eyes wander the surrounding area
hmph
no where to be found
hopeless
oh a glance...
confidence builds
oh a stare...
butterflies appear
oh a smile...
just returning the favour
hehe a good feeling indeed

self realization

ew i hate reviewing myself but lately i have been ... self evaluation in a way ... its not very pleasant.. you know i've realized that i dont have a group of people who are my people ... like you know how "Friends" is... they are a group of people who are each others people. I DONT HAVE THAT. i mean i have my person (excerpt from grey's) ... and she knows who she is.. LOL and then i have no one else ... ok i had two people... now one is gone and it feels like i have no one else becuz my person found their person and then it leaves me with no person anymore... IF THAT EVEN MAKES SENSE oki newais main points
self realization fact 1 : I am a loner
self realization fact 2 : I rely too much on other people and when they are gone i am no one o.0
self realization fact 3 : I need a life.
OKI they all revolve around the fact that i have no one and i need people to make me happy o.0 but then who doesn't right ... but yeah its so sad ... i find it sad.. i never knew how lonely i was until everyone else moved on and im like left behind... never make someone your everything, because when that someone is gone, you end up with nothing. i never knew how true that was... i made someone my everything and now ... i feel lonely... and empty... odd... i actually thought of myself as having a larger social group but ... apparently i do not... hummm yeah this sux ... lol now im finding myself trying to find a new group of people... it's not working ... i hm it's funny when i discussed this with iqra lol its still funny now xp ... dude self realization sux and only re-evaluate urself when u need to... ughhh

Time to chillax =]

need major chillage time ^^ stress over i can relax cuz this semester is over chiki chiki yeah yeah xp



oh mahn the quarrels of never-ending words that attack me head gah
sleeeep how our long awaited meeting shall finally be complete ;]

OH EM GEE

double u tee eff

I have an exam tmr and yet i feel the need to stay on this blogger site ... I PRAY TO GOD that i'll be ready for tmr... ='[ oh em gee...

falling short of intelligence and time ... shud i study now? ...

ugh

unspeakable words come to pass
as the cry of the heart fades
numbness spreads its calamity
and the soul withers away

no emotions no love
no reason no sanity
no reconciliation
of dignity

passed the point
of no return
leaves only running
to the one yearned

chasing whats not really there
hoping of that if or just maybe
can complete the other half
of what i used to be

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